We started out at The Cellar for $1 bottled beers, went to some random bar in the TL and then ended up taking the 38 Geary all the way to Clement St. to some dive bar where Zack's friend was. There was a very attractive African American dude who did an amazing, amazing Obama impression. Miros and I laughed hysterically (he sounded just like him.) Miros and I danced to old 60's music. Then I danced with some completely drunk dude who told me he loved me.
Would you judge me possible reader if I told you that all I have felt like doing lately is drinking? and yoga...
Saturday I went with the roomies to the soapbox races. I was feeling tired, grumpy and annoyed. I couldn't see anything, there were way too many fucking people. We decided to leave and go to the Belgian frie place on Valencia instead. I had a beer and small fries with jalapeno ketchup sauce. I ate the fries because they were there and they had salt, but I enjoyed my beer much more. The fries were not the best fries I had ever tasted.
Saturday night I read and drank a couple of gin and tonics in my room by myself. I loathed in self pity and called Allan.
Sunday Dan and I went hiking on the Peninsula. We went for an 8 mile hike about 45 miles south of San Francisco. It was beautiful, the sun was shining. I felt completely relaxed and happy. The hike cleared my head. I wasn't worried about money, finding a job, or my parents nagging me about finding a job...
Before the trail started to climb for several miles Dan and I sat and had a snack. Looking out at the landscape I thought: this is what life is all about, this here, this nature and this world is bigger than me and my predicament. There is nothing I would rather be doing right now on this warm, beautiful Sunday afternoon.
After the hike, on a whim, Dan and I decided to drive to Santa Cruz for a beer and a visit to the beach. :)
Today I sat on the couch in my boxers and bathrobe from 9:30 to 2:00 working on my resume and applying for jobs and trying to figure out Ruby's printer. I took occasional breaks for tea, water, salad, potatoes, half a cookie....
At 2:00 I made a conscious decision to take a shower. To enter out of depression one must make conscious decisions to move and do something else. A shower is a move in a different direction. I showered; then after Ruby left I turned up my music really, really loud, screamed the lyrics and danced in an angry fashion in my room. At 4:00 I biked to yoga.
OMG After yoga I felt so much better. I got really excited today because I might be able to go to Yoga for free after my month introductory trial is over. I talked to the guy in charge of their "work/study" program today. He said that if I volunteer 2.5 hours a week I can go to Yoga as much as I want for free. This, my friends was a message - a message that things are going to work out for me. I was stressed out that I won't be able to afford yoga after my month trial. But then, I saw a sign and it said: "free yoga?- talk to Steve" so I talked to Steve. He said there were only 4-5 positions left and that I should talk to him again in Nov after my 30 day trial... so we will see.
When I got home from Yoga there was a letter saying that I had been awarded Unemployment benefits. Yes, Yes indeed things will be okay.
No comments:
Post a Comment